"Hey man...we moved your tent. People we know and like showed up."
- Larry, making enemies and alienating people
Chris: |
What time do the bands start? |
Jay: |
Schedule says 6, so 7 at least. |
Chris: |
You think that late? |
Jay : |
(Looking at Chris like he's stupid) It's rock and roll, man. |
Connie: |
Yeah, Larry's having a sandwich in a can. |
Chris: |
Oh, like the grain in beer is a...nevermind, I get it. I've never heard that before. |
Larry: |
Makes sense though. |
Chris: |
Yeah. We should invent actual sandwiches with alcohol in them. Wild turkey turkey! Beefeater roast beef! |
"Alright, I'm drunk! I'm ready to groove like a record, baby!"
- Chris, coining phrases that shouldn't be coined
"We'll see you later, man. Go polish your sword!"
- Dan, with an original one!
"Steve's rubbing oil on his wood again."
- Larry, commenting on Steve taking care of his merchandise...I can't make this not sound dirty.
"I may be hard on the outside, but I'm soft on the inside."
- Chris, wearing armor but needing to go to the gym
Connie: |
Honey, my finger's bleeding! |
Larry: |
Not my problem. (walks away) |
"I always feel smarter when you're around."
- Connie, giving compliments with double meanings
Chris: |
Hey, man, I like your beard! |
Matt: |
Thanks. I learned how to grow it on Beards.com. |
"You hurt me mentally."
- Chris, taking abuse
"Every one of my shirts has throw up on it."
- Kelsey Kupkake, having a good weekend
Austyn: |
Jen nailed her mailman. |
Chris: |
Did he make a "special delivery"? Wow...I'm really sorry I said that. |
Chris: |
If we don't get the lights working we'll look retarded! |
Connie: |
You wear cardboard armor around here. How are we supposed to NOT look retarded? |
Chris: |
Touche. |
"Who brought all the KY?"
- A random passer-by...who I followed
"ARE YOU READY FOR WHOLE WHEAT BREAD!!!!"
- Yelled from a random camp in the dark
"My head is thriving!"
- Kevin, drunk, looking for the word "throbbing"
Kevin: |
Can I have some aspirin please? |
Cheryl: |
Here's a couple. |
Kevin: |
Can I have three? Look how big this head is! |
Cheryl: |
Kevin! Wake up, you drunk ass! You're going to fall in the fire! |
Kevin: |
That would be quite a fire. I got a lot of fat on me. |
"If you're going to dress up like a chicken, you're going to lose a shoe."
- Overheard at the corner camp. Sound advice.
"I'm missing a nut."
- Chris, having armor problems
Chris: |
I should take up professional wrestling as Sir Yuengling. But I need a finishing move. |
Larry: |
"Pow! You just got Good Knighted!" Yeah, I can see you beating up little kids. |
Chris: |
(Eating BBQ) I just had a thousand million dollar idea! Barbeque tie dye! |
Lea: |
You just spilled on yourself, didn't you? |
Chris: |
....yes. |
"You look like a baby with applesauce."
- Chris to Austyn after she managed to get most
of the Pucker she was mooching on her face
|